I used to love to research vacation destinations. I still like to look at websites and dream of where I might go. But we are now three weeks from Spring Break and I have still not booked our vacation. Originally we were hoping to go to Whistler, BC. But as you may have read in the post about my lost passport, I still do not have a passport so while I could go to Whistler, I would not be able to return home. So I have now started looking into local vacation options. Unfortunately, all the local options involve a lot more choices than I like. I am a Disney traveler. I like to book my hotel, buy my tickets, and be done with decisions beyond where to eat lunch. But the local resorts have lots of different rental options, resort locations and amenities, as well as a whole host of ski school options. So I am now faced with a lot of decisions and I just want to put my head down and give up. Staying home for Spring Break could be nice. Except I don't want to disappoint my kids.
The boys are really excited to learn to ski and surprisingly love the snow. Maybe because we actually invested in some good snow clothes, boots and gloves for them. I remember as a kid always being cold and wet in the snow. My long hair dripping with wet snow, whipping my face as I headed down the hill on my old school style sled. I liked the snow as a kid but I did not like being cold and wet. The one time my family took me skiing, I was wearing jeans and kept falling down so that quickly I was cold, wet and falling down a hill. I gave up rather quickly after that and have not skied since. It never occurred to me that my kids would want to ski or do anything snow related. But turns out after living in California for two winters, the big excitement of moving home was snow. They really wanted to see snow, play in snow, go sledding and now skiing. This year though I found the secret to enjoying snow. Good snow clothes. The right gear makes all the difference. Though I don't think it will help with the falling portion of learning to ski. And that part still makes me nervous.
My worry is that as I am getting older, new things are starting to scare me. I find myself not wanting to try new things, especially new things that involve speed, heights or the possibility of serious bodily injury. It is a good thing to have a healthy sense of self preservation, but I am slowly becoming old, scared of things that should be fun and exciting. I am worried I am becoming an old woman, someone who will be too scared to fly to see my grandkids. Someone who would rather stay in my house than get out into the world. And I don't want that! I want to enjoy the world when I finally have the freedom and finances to do it. I want to see Istanbul and go to a wildlife preserve in Africa. I want to go swishing down the snow covered mountain, ideally on a snowboard because I want to be cool and hip. I want to take chances because I know without taking chances life gets dull and I get stuck in a rut.
So it is time to get over my anxieties and worries of trying to plan the perfect vacation, trying to find the absolute best place to stay. It is time to get over my fear of the phone and call the ski school and actually talk to a real person about the best way to get everyone in my family up and skiing. It is time for me to take a chance on something, without expectations of perfection. It is time to step up and book our reservations.
But since it is 10:30pm I will have to wait until tomorrow.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Life in the Fairy Tales
I think I am living a fairy tale life. Not Cinderella, which was my favorite growing up, or any of the other princess movies. I have found my prince, but does happily ever after really exist? Long term yes, but my day to day living does not involve mice and birds making my bed, cleaning my house or tying a ribbon in my hair. I do relate a bit to Snow White since I spend my days cooking and cleaning for little men.
I sometimes feel like the mom of the three little pigs. Hockey boy would definitely build his house of bricks. Little One would probably be the one using sticks or wood but having seen his lego building skills I am pretty sure the Big Bad Wolf could blow it down pretty quick. MIddle Man, what to say about Middle Man? I am pretty sure he would be the straw one, though I doubt he would actually build a house with the straw. More likely he would make a big pile of the straw, climb inside and call it good. In his defense, I think the Big Bad Wolf would probably walk right by the pile of straw though so his plan may be genius. Thankfully, for Little One and Middle Man, Hockey Boy is a very caring big brother and I am sure he would let them move him. He already plans to have them all live together in their own house someday in Detroit when they are playing for the Red Wings. Three grown boys in one house makes me think I will be staying in a hotel when I visit.
When I am not living with the Three Little Pigs, I find myself feeling like we have entered the home of the Three Bears. If it is not too hot, it's too loud, or too bright, or too wet, or too cold. What works for one of my boys, does not work on the others. Hockey Boy loves hot showers. Little One hates things too hot. He likes his corn dogs cold, but Middle Man wants his hot. The tv is too loud says Little One. I can't hear they then all shout when I start loading the dishwasher. One can't sleep because he is too hot but I refuse to turn the air conditioner on in the middle of winter when I am freezing because someone likes to sleep all snug in way too many blankets. Occasionally, there is a rare and magical moment when all is just right in their worlds. The moment when their little eyes are closed, their bodies at peace, as they sleep. And then I want to climb into bed with them and enjoy the just right moment.
I really do have a fairy tale life. It might be more a Grimm's Fairy Tale then the Disney versions but still a fairy tale.
I sometimes feel like the mom of the three little pigs. Hockey boy would definitely build his house of bricks. Little One would probably be the one using sticks or wood but having seen his lego building skills I am pretty sure the Big Bad Wolf could blow it down pretty quick. MIddle Man, what to say about Middle Man? I am pretty sure he would be the straw one, though I doubt he would actually build a house with the straw. More likely he would make a big pile of the straw, climb inside and call it good. In his defense, I think the Big Bad Wolf would probably walk right by the pile of straw though so his plan may be genius. Thankfully, for Little One and Middle Man, Hockey Boy is a very caring big brother and I am sure he would let them move him. He already plans to have them all live together in their own house someday in Detroit when they are playing for the Red Wings. Three grown boys in one house makes me think I will be staying in a hotel when I visit.
When I am not living with the Three Little Pigs, I find myself feeling like we have entered the home of the Three Bears. If it is not too hot, it's too loud, or too bright, or too wet, or too cold. What works for one of my boys, does not work on the others. Hockey Boy loves hot showers. Little One hates things too hot. He likes his corn dogs cold, but Middle Man wants his hot. The tv is too loud says Little One. I can't hear they then all shout when I start loading the dishwasher. One can't sleep because he is too hot but I refuse to turn the air conditioner on in the middle of winter when I am freezing because someone likes to sleep all snug in way too many blankets. Occasionally, there is a rare and magical moment when all is just right in their worlds. The moment when their little eyes are closed, their bodies at peace, as they sleep. And then I want to climb into bed with them and enjoy the just right moment.
I really do have a fairy tale life. It might be more a Grimm's Fairy Tale then the Disney versions but still a fairy tale.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Desires of our Heart
I am reading through the Bible this year with a group of girl friends. We are using a reading plan that has us doing a little Old Testament, a little New Testament, some Proverbs and a Psalm every day. It does not take a lot of time, unless you procrastinate a few days and then find yourself having to read 10 chapters of Exodus and the exact measurements for the building of the Ark of the Covenant. For extra motivation, beyond the joy that comes from reading God's Word, there is a prize, a prize that involves a hotel room, sleeping in and a whole day with the girls. I wonder how many different ways we can paint our toes in just one girls getaway. In order to attend this girls getaway though you have to have completed the whole Bible, every single verse, this year, 2010. No exceptions. And since I am the rules keeper, I can't fall behind. I don't want to miss the fun.
So recently, I was catching up a bit on my reading and was struck by something I read in Psalms 37, something I have read dozens of times. I am using the Bible I used in college because it is easy on the eyes without any notes and good size type. My eyes are getting old and my little pocket Bible really does not work, at least not if I actually want to read the words. It is awfully cute though in pink and orange leather. In Psalm 37 I have verse 4 circled. "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." You hear this all the time around the church, but what does it mean. Over the years I have come to the conclusion that the more we seek God, the more we walk in His ways, the more our desires will align with His. What I liked about reading Psalm 37 this time was seeing verse 4 in context.
Trust, Delight, Commit, Wait.
This is why I really do love reading the Bible without a study or plan beyond just reading it. I am struck anew each time I do by something that is both timely for me and eternal from God. When I am not going to the Bible with my intentions, my plans, my interpretation, but just read what is before me, God speaks clearly through His word.
Trust. Delight. Commit. Wait.
Just what I needed to hear.
So recently, I was catching up a bit on my reading and was struck by something I read in Psalms 37, something I have read dozens of times. I am using the Bible I used in college because it is easy on the eyes without any notes and good size type. My eyes are getting old and my little pocket Bible really does not work, at least not if I actually want to read the words. It is awfully cute though in pink and orange leather. In Psalm 37 I have verse 4 circled. "Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." You hear this all the time around the church, but what does it mean. Over the years I have come to the conclusion that the more we seek God, the more we walk in His ways, the more our desires will align with His. What I liked about reading Psalm 37 this time was seeing verse 4 in context.
"Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:
He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,
the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him"
Trust, Delight, Commit, Wait.
This is why I really do love reading the Bible without a study or plan beyond just reading it. I am struck anew each time I do by something that is both timely for me and eternal from God. When I am not going to the Bible with my intentions, my plans, my interpretation, but just read what is before me, God speaks clearly through His word.
Trust. Delight. Commit. Wait.
Just what I needed to hear.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Mommy Knows Best
At least some of the time, it turns out that Mommy really does know best. Little One learned this lesson on Friday when I took him to the zoo. It has been gorgeous here in the Pacific Northwest, sunny skies and warmish temperatures. And when the sun comes out in February, in this part of the country, we head outside to soak up as much vitamin D as we can. We know we need to store it up in our cheeks like a squirrel with nuts, because come April we will be in the midst of a depressingly long month of rain.
So on Thursday, when our morning plans fell through, I decided I would be Mommy of the Year and take Little One to the zoo while is brothers were at school. Seemed like a winner plan until I mentioned it to Little One, at which point I found out that he considered a trip to the zoo an act of the meanest Mommy in the world. He wanted nothing to do with it. He did not want to go to the zoo. I tried to talk him into it telling him about all the great animals we would see, lions and tigers and bears. "Oh my" thought Little One. It turns out he was scared. I know he gets scared around dogs and such but to be scared of the zoo? Well actually, I am not totally surprised by the zoo fear. When he was little, we were at the San Francisco zoo and I took him into the big family farm petting zoo area in his stroller. I thought I had gotten all the food secured, but I guess there was one cracker hiding behind Little One. Those goats are tenacious! I thought he had grown out of his fear because he went back to the San Francisco Zoo a few more times and had a great time. But I guess not. I let the idea go for Thursday because his reaction was so extreme, but I was not going to let this go.
I knew though that he would love the zoo, once I got him there. So the next day, I loaded him into the van and started driving. He kept asking where we were going and I told him a few pieces of information, the city name, that we would be walking around outside in the sun, that there would be lots of people having fun. But I never said the word zoo, or animals or anything that might give my deception away. He eventually figured it out after we bought our tickets and started to walk in and he saw the animals. Thankfully our zoo has a long entry way, that feels a bit, a very little bit, like a hike through the woods. So I was able to ease him into the main part of the zoo. Little One was pretty nervous at first, backing away from the animal enclosures. I picked him up to see the otters and he was a bit shaky. But then we found the big sea lions, swimming behind a huge sheet of glass and he fell in love with the place. Turns out he feels much more comfortable behind glass than with wire netting acting as a cage. May be from all those visits to the aquarium. But once he got comfortable, he really got into the visit, wanting to see the penguins swimming and the polar bears sleeping. He liked it best when there were two or more animals together, always pointing to the "friend". He was still a little scared at the lion exhibit and stayed pretty far back, though still making sure he could see the two "friends" sleeping together on the rocks. As we were walking out he said the lions had been quiet. I guess he had expected them to ROAR their terrible Roar and GNASH their terrible teeth.
As I was dragging Little One out of the zoo that he refused to visit the day before, he said, "I like the zoo." He is already planning what animals he wants to visit next time he goes. It may seem cruel to force a three year old to face his fears, but sometimes that's what we need to do. I am sure there is an important lesson in here for me as well. Sometimes I need to face my fears because the experience really will be fun.
So on Thursday, when our morning plans fell through, I decided I would be Mommy of the Year and take Little One to the zoo while is brothers were at school. Seemed like a winner plan until I mentioned it to Little One, at which point I found out that he considered a trip to the zoo an act of the meanest Mommy in the world. He wanted nothing to do with it. He did not want to go to the zoo. I tried to talk him into it telling him about all the great animals we would see, lions and tigers and bears. "Oh my" thought Little One. It turns out he was scared. I know he gets scared around dogs and such but to be scared of the zoo? Well actually, I am not totally surprised by the zoo fear. When he was little, we were at the San Francisco zoo and I took him into the big family farm petting zoo area in his stroller. I thought I had gotten all the food secured, but I guess there was one cracker hiding behind Little One. Those goats are tenacious! I thought he had grown out of his fear because he went back to the San Francisco Zoo a few more times and had a great time. But I guess not. I let the idea go for Thursday because his reaction was so extreme, but I was not going to let this go.
I knew though that he would love the zoo, once I got him there. So the next day, I loaded him into the van and started driving. He kept asking where we were going and I told him a few pieces of information, the city name, that we would be walking around outside in the sun, that there would be lots of people having fun. But I never said the word zoo, or animals or anything that might give my deception away. He eventually figured it out after we bought our tickets and started to walk in and he saw the animals. Thankfully our zoo has a long entry way, that feels a bit, a very little bit, like a hike through the woods. So I was able to ease him into the main part of the zoo. Little One was pretty nervous at first, backing away from the animal enclosures. I picked him up to see the otters and he was a bit shaky. But then we found the big sea lions, swimming behind a huge sheet of glass and he fell in love with the place. Turns out he feels much more comfortable behind glass than with wire netting acting as a cage. May be from all those visits to the aquarium. But once he got comfortable, he really got into the visit, wanting to see the penguins swimming and the polar bears sleeping. He liked it best when there were two or more animals together, always pointing to the "friend". He was still a little scared at the lion exhibit and stayed pretty far back, though still making sure he could see the two "friends" sleeping together on the rocks. As we were walking out he said the lions had been quiet. I guess he had expected them to ROAR their terrible Roar and GNASH their terrible teeth.
As I was dragging Little One out of the zoo that he refused to visit the day before, he said, "I like the zoo." He is already planning what animals he wants to visit next time he goes. It may seem cruel to force a three year old to face his fears, but sometimes that's what we need to do. I am sure there is an important lesson in here for me as well. Sometimes I need to face my fears because the experience really will be fun.
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