Monday, October 13, 2014

4 of 642

I am a planner, to the extreme, though I am not necessarily a detail person. I like to know what is happening next, and in an hour, next week, and next year. I like to dream about the possibilities, all of them, or at least all of the good ones. 

I also de-stress by planning for possible bad outcomes. Husband traveling overseas has me figuring out what I would do if he died or was seriously hurt? How would I get him home? Who could I call to watch the kids? Or what if he dies here in Wisconsin? Where would the funeral be? Buried or cremated (this is actually an ongoing debate in our home)? 

So when asked to write a Facebook update for 2017, that’s easy. I imagine that my life will look pretty similar to today. It is only three more years. I’m sure my updates then will look a lot like now. Hockey, sick kids, holiday pictures, Middle Man’s latest adventure. Though there will be some changes that year. My oldest will be in high school, though at this moment I cannot imagine that ever happening. And Little One, he’ll be a sixth grader, the age his biggest brother is now. 

But when I look backwards, I see how much can really change in three years. It was just over three years ago that we left Oregon, the place where each of my boys was born and the house that was perfect because it was two blocks from the high school. It was just over two years ago that we bought a condo in California because it was all we could afford and we knew it was time to put down roots there. It was just over a year ago that we boarded a plane to move to Wisconsin, a place a first saw on our house hunting trip the month before we moved. 

A lot can change in three years. 

And yet, our lives today look very similar to the lives we had before we ever left Oregon. My husband goes to work. The kids go to school. They come home and do homework, bicker, and head off to sports and music lessons.  And I spend my days doing the things that have to happen around our house all while trying to figure out how to have purpose and value beyond the day to day stay at home mother role I fill. On the weekends, we go to church, we go to hockey, baseball or swim meets, we watch sports on tv and monitor video game time. We try to create family memories and include some adventures along the way. We spend time with friends, we build relationships with those around us. We connect. 

Our surroundings have changed. The faces have changed. But the key part of me is still my family and so far, we move together. 

Someday, those little boys are going to become big and head off to college or the great big world. I can picture their lives, or at least possible versions of their future. I can see their dreams coming true. 

But for my life, I see the every day. 

We will go to work, go to church, try to find purpose in our lives. We will connect with those around us. We will go on adventures and create memories. 

And I will continue to post random updates from my life on Facebook and Twitter. 

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