Beloved

I don't usually write about my husband for a lot of reasons, but mostly because if he wanted to tell his story he would have his own blog. Also since he does not read my blog, it would feel a bit weird, like I was talking about him behind his back. But today I am making an exception because thirteen years ago today, I married my beloved.

When I was in college, I spent a semester living in Europe with a group of kids from my college, studying European history and literature while traveling to all the great locations, taking classes in the basement of our youth hostel or on a bus as we drove through the Alps. On this trip I got to know one of the great kindred spirits of my life. One night while staying in a hotel in Italy she and I made a list of the qualities we wanted in our men. Here is the list:

- leader (both spiritually and in everyday life)
- FUN!
- good family
- sensitive yet not sappy!
- stimulate us/challenge us spiritually
- not be afraid to be put in embarrassing spots and be able to embarrass us (all mine)
- content in his situation (including financially)
- willing to try new things
- cross cultural experience
And still others I have forgotten!

As I retype this list, I am humored and a bit embarrassed by what I wanted. Some of those things are actually rather mature for two 19 year olds traipsing through Europe. But looking back now, I cannot imagine ever wanting to be in embarrassing situations. I did not know at the time, but I think I wanted someone who was comfortable in their own skin, confident of who they were.

It was a few years later, that my husband and I met on another college study program but this time in DC. Our paths would have never crossed if we had not both been there that semester. But God had a plan in place, a plan that would bring two people who needed each other and were best for each other together. When I married my husband, I married someone I truly felt safe with. I married a partner who would take me on grand adventures around the world and who would also help me grow in my own time and space. I married a hard worker who would provide me a life I never expected but who I am also confident would be okay if we had nothing. I married a man who is an amazing father to our three boys, who is calm and able to see them with a long time lens. I married a grown up, someone emotionally stable and constant, someone who provides a sense of security and peace I desperately needed. I married a man who loves God and wants to do the right thing no matter the cost, who is willing to make tough choices and take risks to follow God's plan. Even if that risk involved marrying a flighty, loud, brash, woman who lived on the west coast.

I grew up praying for my future husband. Asking God to bring me my perfect prince. People kept telling me I had to get out there, be more assertive, that Prince Charming was not going to just knock on my door one day. But I knew that God had the right guy out there for me. I did not need to go chasing him down because God had a plan. And then one day, my beloved literally knocked on my door.