Thursday, April 21, 2011

Professional Planner

"I love it when a plan comes together." - The A Team

I agree. I am a planner by nature, a professional planner - unpaid of course. I like to think about the future and start lining things up. I like to plan and then re-plan. I like to think of all the contingencies and then make plans for those. It is how I deal with the stress of the unknown. I plan for any possible outcome.

Let me clarify though before you ask me to plan the next women's tea at church. I like to plan my family's future. I like to plan vacations. I like to think about what I would write or say in a given situation. I do not like to plan meals, find volunteers, or decorate anything. I like the big picture, defining a vision, but I am not in the details. I get lost in the details. I have learned that about myself this year.

I used to think that someday I would maybe go to seminary and possibly work in women's ministries. I can still see me going to seminary. I love going to school and learning. And I can still see me teaching in women's ministries. But after a year of being behind the scenes at my church, I have learned that I am not made to work in women's ministries. I am not made to run any program. My body, mind and heart are not wired for that kind of work. The kind of work that requires attention to detail, lots of relationships and meetings, and follow up emails.

I so love women's ministries. I love being with other women who love God or are just learning about the joy of being in relationship with God. I love women's Bible studies and retreats. And a part of me I think, was trying to figure out a plan for my life that involved me working in an area I love. Working in an area where I saw a need. I was trying to plan.

But what I have seen over the last few months is that God has a plan that does not have to involve me. He is at work in other people's lives, not just my own. He is calling other amazing women to serve Him. He is preparing hearts to take on new tasks, new challenges, new responsibilities apart from me. He does not need me here.

I have been blessed these last few months to be in a few different circles where people were separately seeking God's purpose. God's purpose for our church. God's purpose for our women. And God's purpose in some individual lives as well. Completely separately I have seen God at work in these circles. I don't know how God's plan is going to work out. I think I see glimpses of amazing things ahead. I think I see the threads binding together. But what I know for sure is God has a plan. He is at work. I don't have to rush around trying to make things work out. I don't have to plan for every contingency. I don't have to figure it all out. God has a plan.

I love it when God's plan comes together.

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